Sober Thoughts

Things I say, feel, and ponder.


happy friday. don’t mind me… i’ll just be sitting in my cubicle trying to survive the longest day of my life while i fight this hangover and regret all the drunk texts i sent out to my crush last night. it’s miserable. whatever happened to me turning 25 and acting like a mature adult? i threw that idea out the window and decided happy hour wasn’t good enough… i needed to relive my glory days and have a full on thirsty thursday evening. what did this result in? a nice little scrap/burn under my eye because sidewalks are for chumps and tree roots are out to get me… at least there was dirt to break my fall.
so kids… lessons can still be learned / revisited even at my age. no i can’t have more than a couple drinks during the week even if they are free. and no i’m not witty while pretending to know about sports. and no drunk texts are ever a good idea. #fail
so i hope your TGIF is off to a better start than mine. it’s taking all the will power i have not to fall asleep right now. and i’ll probably be hitting up burger king later because i just have to.

don’t drink. stay in school.

25th Bday was a success.  I got to spend it with my dearest friends and even made a few new ones (featured in pic).  But alas it is time to grow up and start behaving in an adult manor.  Also, I think I saw my last ounce of metabolism leave my body so I am going to be getting back into a work out regimen now that spring has sprung.  Who’s with me?

Walk People.

So I have a new pet peeve… it’s people that shuffle their feet. As I was sitting in my cubicle this morning I hear feet shuffling/staggering over to my desk. It sounded like a drunk person attempting to walk. I was immediately annoyed and the whole time the person was talking to me I was thinking “I can’t believe that’s how this girl actually walks”.
So people… please. Strut you’re shit. I don’t mean act like every hallway is a runway. I mean pick up your feet and take adequate strides. You are an adult. Not a toddler.

Get your shit together.

Young the Giant put on a spectacular show last night at First Ave in Minneapolis. still in awe.

Excited to see this guy open for Young the Giant tonight. Commence birthday week!!

(Source: Spotify)

Smitten Kitten

Happy Monday. I know there are a lot of last minute colds going around so I hope you are all healthy and well. I, on the other hand, have been in quarantine all weekend focused on feeling better… and I’m almost there.
You guys… I have a crush. The good news is… I didn’t meet him on tinder. The bad news is… I haven’t seen him in like a week! I don’t want to go into detail because a week from now we probably won’t be talking. But just know my heart is starting to unthaw from this very cold and lonely winter.

Happy Wednesday to one and all.  I have a feeling we can all relate to this drawing one way or another.

Happy Wednesday to one and all. I have a feeling we can all relate to this drawing one way or another.


So another week has come and gone. Maybe it’s the decent weather that makes the days more bearable. Maybe it’s slowly but surely picking items from your summer wardrobe to wear. Maybe it’s wearing flats instead of boots. You get the picture. The funny thing is though… it’s still only 40 degrees which in other regions is considered cold.
But have no fear, the weekend is here. Although I don’t have much going on I’m kind of okay with that. The closer my 25th birthday gets… the less I care about going out and the more I accept I’m going to be single forever. Call it an epiphany… or just plain being a loser.

Tinder Update

I can’t decide how I feel about this post. So I’ve had the app Tinder for a month or so and have been matched with 200+ bros in the Minneapolis area. Last night I had the pleasure of going on my first Tinder “date”. I had been messaging the guy for a week and he finally popped the question “so… should we meet up?” We are both busy worker bees so scheduling a meeting was a task but we accomplished a meeting time and place (at a casual bar/grill after work). We sat down and I think both of our faces read “wtf what do I say?” So we quickly blurted out the first few questions that came to mind to get the convo started. To sum it up it was 1.5 hours of questions and stories and awkward eye contact/glances around the room. We finally got our tab after an extended period of us swirling our straws and poking around ice cubes.
Initially I thought it went well giving the fact we met over a smartphone app. It could have obviously gone worse. But the more I thought about it as I made a quick Target run the more I realized… yeahhhhh no. He didn’t make me laugh once. I mean, sure there was the typical “ha yeah” but that was the extent of my laughter. I don’t know about you but I’m the type of girl where a sense of humor is essential and can make up for a lot of lacking traits.
Today I was hoping he maybe felt the same way… crossing my fingers I wouldn’t get any texts. Thinking I was home free until 2:00 came around and my phone vibed. So here I sit… in a pickle. The “I feel bad not texting him back but I’m not interested/don’t want to lead him on pickle”. The “do I just tell him straight up or just make minimal conversation with no questions until he gets the idea” pickle.
Dating is hard and at this point arranged marriage is looking pretty good. To be continued…

I just can’t do it anymore.

Call me crazy… tell me I will have no social life and die single. But I just can’t do it anymore. My drinking days are over. Friday night I went out with a friend and 1 drink led to 5 more. Fast forward to me getting knocked down on the dance floor and beer getting spilt on me. Then fast forward to Saturday when I did nothing with my life because my car was still downtown and I couldn’t function.
I’m turning 25 in a couple weeks and I’m hoping to make that my last hurrah for awhile. Of course I’ll still hit up the happy hour and weekend brunch specials but I need to start regulating myself and not act like I’m 22. I’m turning a new leaf people… the responsible-lady like kind.